Being pregnant is terrifying.
Truly. (Especially when you weren't PLANNING to be 5 months pregnant on your 10 year wedding anniversary in October when you wanted to go to someowhere cool, like, oh, I don't know, GREECE, and then 7 months pregnant on your 39th birthday next year...But I digress...)

I have to admit, I have no idea what I'm doing (for the first time in a very long time) and it's terrifying. For example, is that half a glass of diet coke with caffeine *gasp* going to make my child grow a unicorn horn?!? And, what about those 7 margaritas I imbibed on my dock on July 4th before I knew I was pregnant?!?(Just kidding mom & dad *ahem*). What about the fact that I really want absolutely no protein at all? Am I creating a vegan or a jellyfish?!? (Or a sailor considering I've been devouring Captain Crunch cereal by the boxes for the first time since I was 9. Hey, a girl has to get her milk somehow!) What about a few times when I forgot to take my pre-natal vitamin? Serious defects?!? And, is beer-battered fish a double whammy?!?

I can tell you one thing, it's definitely too much pressure for an old chick who's pretty much always known what was going to happen in her life. The next thing you know I'll be unsupervised and running with scissors.

Oh my...is this turning into a mommy blog?!?


Anonymous said... @ 11:19 PM

And how OLD will you be when "Mini-You" graduates from high school? College?

Sorry! Couldn't resist! Heehee!

J. Wilson said... @ 7:45 AM


MizMell said... @ 8:10 AM

Pregnancy is quite the experience. If you think about it seriously, it's nothing short of a miracle really.

I've done it twice (a hundred years ago, it seems) and probably would have done it more, had my "baby carriage" not been removed at age 27.

URBAN PEDESTRIAN said... @ 8:57 AM

I was once a pregnant old broad(now I'm just an old broad)and of course, whatever you do it's going to be the wrong thing and whatever happens or doesn't happen with and/or to your child now and for all eternity is going to be your fault. But it's all worth it because what you're going feel for that little being you're heaving around, is like nothing else you have or ever will experience.

J. Wilson said... @ 9:27 AM

I guess I will always have the solace that the kid can grow up and air our dirty laundry and how much I mistreated him/her on some Oprah-like show in the future.

That's a comfort.

Michelle said... @ 6:41 PM

Glad to find another fiction writing soon-to-be-momma. :)

Nope, have the caffeine. No horns on my first and the ultrasound shows the second is without horn too. I never was a big protein person to begin with. Tip: try peanut butter crunch for the extra protein in the morning. I ate that throughout my first pregnancy before I panicked about peanut allergies. (Fine there too.)

minnie said... @ 11:28 PM

i spent some time freaking about the bloody marys i drank before i realized i was pregnant.. and then i drank one cup of coffee a day the rest of the pregnancy and min turned out okay!
don't sweat it!

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