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Ok. So I've had the joy of waking around 3 a.m. every morning, for some unknown reason. Thus, I've had the opportunity to clock some serious "paid programming" time (and there's some wrinkle cream that I'm TOTALLY buying, just so you know). ANYWAY, at around 5 a.m. this morning I saw something that takes the cake. There's an infomercial for taking Bahama vacation trips called BAHAMAVENTION. From the title, I'm sure you can surmise the premise. Yep, it's 30 minutes of pretending like these ugly, fat, (and apparently stupid) people are receiving interventions from loved ones to get a Bahama vacation.


This older, white-haired, nice-looking man "hosts" the infomercial as a serious "these are the symptoms" and "this is how you can perform a Bahamavention." DANNY is the "star" of the infomercial. Checking him out should give you more of an idea. (Seriously, have you ever seen uglier people in a TV commercial?? What was the casting call? "Looking for people to star in satirical infomercial. Must be ugly, fat, or unable to act. Bonus payment for all three.")

I found myself honestly annoyed. Maybe it was the lake of sleep, but most likely it was this sad attempt at humor that falls completely flat. The only thing that made me chuckle was the "Are you tired of being constantly blinded by your loved ones dangerously untanned skin?" (We always joke that Todd "glows" he's so white. However, this still didn't make me want to go to the Bahamas).

It may sound funny in print, but honestly it may have been the most annoying thing that I've ever seen. There were NO pictures, film or ANYTHING ELSE of the beautiful Bahamas (ok, to be fair, you see some brief still pics 14 minutes into the informercial. Yes, I timed. Hey, at 5 a.m. what else to I have to do?) What is more annoying at 5 a.m. than watching ugly, fat people who can't act as they try to be funny in a tongue-in-check way and never seeing any of the Bahamas? I can't think of anything.

So, to the marketing geniuses who thought up this annoying waste of money without showing the Bahamas? Sorry, no go. Cancun, Mexico, here I come...