My (Apparent) SuperSized Head

So.

I need a serious makeover. I mean, in addition to the 3,000 pounds to lose that we won't mention, I just need a serious makeover.

I look tired.

My complexion looks all blah.

My hair is limp (not to mention it is falling out).

And it needs some serious shaping.

I need a pedicure (or maybe just one of those Ped-Eggs, I haven't decided yet).

And I smell.

(Ok, I made up the last one, but, hey, you never know when you leave the house with baby vomit in inconspicuous places).

(Don't laugh. It did could happen.)

So anyway, when I'm out spending what little money I have on frivolous items like, you know, DIAPERS AND FORMULA, I decided to get some of those cute headbands. You know the ones that are skinny, but you wear around smoothed back hair? The ones that you can double up on to make them look even cuter? You know, like this:

It is probably SO LAST YEAR, but I don't care. I think it's cute and I need some help with this hair that I wear up ALL.THE.TIME.

I can't remember the last time I bought myself something so FRIVOLOUS (yes, I know, sad. Shut up), so I was pretty excited. I get home, get the baby situated and RUN to the bathroom to try my new gift to myself! Only to find? Apparently my butt is not the only thing that is too fat. I guess my head is, too. My cute little hair "bands" squeeze themselves until they rubber band right off the back of my head.

I mean, is it REALLY too much to ask for just a little tiny bit of Tra-La-La Here Comes the Sun Feelin' Good About Myself!?!?

*sigh*